Do you ever look at that person and think “Blimey, they have got their shit together; they’re on top of everything; they know exactly what they are doing”?
Well the reality is that it’s a myth. It’s a show.
Nobody is in that space, well, not for very long anyway. Sometimes people say that about me and it makes me laugh because it’s a very elusive feeling. That feeling of being on top of things.
Each time I feel it, I feel great for about a minute. Then I start to worry about what I’ve forgotten or missed. It’s also rare that one might feel this in ALL areas of life at the same time because change is our constant, especially at the moment. Everyone has been challenged by the intensity of the pace of change and these ever-shifting sands around us.
This pursuit of getting it all together is very closely related to being motivated by achievement (which I am). It has taken all of my 42 years to realise that it is entirely unachievable, so I’d better shift my focus to being ok with not being on top of it all. It seems like I am constantly pursuing that elusive feeling and I place extra layers of stress on myself by doing so.
It’s not going to change overnight but I am focusing on the positive, on what I have got done, and on creating space where I can think clearly to prioritise effectively. I am trying not to set myself impossible challenges but rather build my resilience, particularly my emotional and physical wellbeing.
There are lots of tools you can use to enable that creation of perspective. The Lean Life Canvas is great for this as it gives you a quick review of where you’re at, what your resources are, and what your burdens are. On page 2, it shifts to future focus, identifying what you have to get done, what you want to get done and the beginnings of action planning to achieve your goals.
If you have used the Lean Life Canvas before, consider going through it again. If you haven’t tried it, then maybe give yourself the gift of awesome perspective or share the awesome!
Whichever tools you use to get perspective and plan your time, remember to use them! It can be so easy to get caught up in the mania of it all, particularly as we build up to Christmas, but take the pressure off so you can genuinely enjoy whatever you do. Nobody and nothing is perfect; we are all deliciously and joyfully human so enjoy being flawed and making mistakes!
I think the essential part here is about finding the right balance for you. My hyper-organisation is part of the expression of my anxiety and I have to let some of that go in order to work well with other people, accepting that it is chaotic and that there is beauty and joy and calm in it too.